Best Reasons for a Special Dinner with Grandkids

With one family member down with Covid, we had to reschedule our special Christmas Eve dinner with the grandkids. Then, I caught a bad cold on Christmas Day.

As the days went by and my cold refused to improve, I considered skipping my favorite tradition since we were now well past Christmas.

But I believe this dinner is important for the social development of the grandkids so I refused to let it go. We were finally able to get together on New Year’s Eve.

Why Special Dinners are Important for Kids

First, creating a special dinner occasion is important for kids to learn proper dining behavior and good table manners. Because they come dressed up, they know this is not our typical weekly Friday night dinner and they rise to the occasion, exhibiting their best behavior.

Second, the table is set festively to convey that this is a gala event. This means, no walking around during the meal or leaving the table before everyone is finished.

Third, the kids learn to sit with grownups and participate in the table conversation. It helps them to become comfortable with social interactions, which will stand them in good stead in life.

Parents are so busy just trying to keep everything together with work, school supervision, and Covid concerns, that these lessons around the table may not be a priority. This is where a grandma can step in to help grandkids develop social skills.

Setting the Table for a Special Dinner with Grandkids

While the holidays have come and gone, you can use these ideas for Valentine’s Day or any other special occasions with the grandkids.

• When the kids were toddlers, I would set out their unbreakable toddler plates and cups, but add whatever extra touches I was using for the adults, such as a Christmas cracker and the candy cane place card as shown in the photo above.
• For candlelight, so important for creating a festive mood, I used battery-powered tea lights in sparkly tea light holders. The battery lights flicker and look quite natural.
• As they got older, I introduced good china and glassware, but not my crystal stemware. Instead, I have a slim, easy-to-hold, fancy tumbler for a young child, who graduates to a squat wine glass when older.
• With the youngest now five years old, I decided to add real candlelight by introducing tall glass candlesticks. These were inexpensive so I could bear it if they were knocked over accidentally. It’s important never to leave lit candlesticks unattended with children present. A safer choice would be pillar candles, since they have a firm base.
• Since we were dining on New Year’s Eve, I set out stemmed IKEA champagne flutes that looked elegant, but cost about a dollar a glass, so the kids could join in a toast with sparkling apple cider. After the toast, the kids’ flutes were removed from the table.

How you set your table will depend on the ages of the grandkids and how rambunctious or mellow they are.

Table Setting: Starting with a Neutral Table

When I am planning a special table setting, I usually have some general idea in mind, but not a full plan. The design evolves as I gather the elements.

Here’s how this New Year’s Eve table setting developed:

I’d have loved to use good china and stemware for this special dinner, but still battling my cold, I knew Steve would have to do the washing up alone afterwards. So, I chose everyday white china and IKEA stemware, but selected good silverware as a concession to elegance. Everything–except the silver–would go into the dishwasher afterwards.

Add Color to your Table Setting

Here’s how I made the table setting pop. I added red napkins and gold snowflake-patterned Christmas crackers that I had cut out with my Cricut machine. Sometimes I buy the crackers, but by making my own, I can select the paper pattern and use ribbons generously to tie the ends. The big red bows add lively color.

Just introducing those two colorful items brightened the table immediately. The red napkins are polyester from Macy’s that I bought on sale years ago. They’re of good weight, and while not as absorbent as natural fibers, they can go into the washer and dryer, and require no ironing at all. Red is much more versatile than you might think: great for Valentine’s Day and Fourth of July celebrations.

Add Height to your Table Setting

Height adds elegance to your table setting; I set out three tall candlesticks. They are fragile, so you’ll want to consider what you can expect from the grandchildren’s behavior before taking a chance. While the candlesticks are inexpensive, glass bits everywhere would be a nightmare.

I also introduced height with gold and silver snowflakes that I had purchased at a craft shop years ago. I hot-glued two together, with a bamboo skewer sandwiched between, then cut the skewers to different lengths. To keep the snowflakes upright, I poked them into halved styrofoam balls covered with epsom salt to look like snowballs (see how at the end of this post). More fully round snowballs would be added later.

Fill the Spaces in Between

I wanted lots of candlelight so I added pillar candles from last year, that I had covered with epsom salt.

If you’re running a design along the length of the table, you’ll want some filler material to provide continuity and make the elements appear more cohesive. For a Thanksgiving table, when I use various types of squash, I add bunches of grapes or strands of ivy to bridge and fill in empty spaces. For this Christmas table, I used evergreen sprigs cut from discarded Christmas tree branches and snowballs made by covering styrofoam balls in epsom salt.

Usually, I would set themed place cards at each place. This year, I had planned to make snowflake boxes filled with homemade truffles as the place cards. But, dealing with my cold, I had to acknowledge that enough was enough.

A Note about the Epsom Salt Snow Effect

The pillar candles and styrofoam balls were coated in white school glue (such as Elmer’s) and sprinkled with epsom salt, similar to the snow-covered branches I made previously. The candles and snowballs will keep for another year or two; if the “snow” falls off, simply re-coat.

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